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Goofy Jesus

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Family Values Jesus

- Matthew 10:35-36:

"For I [Jesus] am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man's foes shall be they of his own household."

- Luke 14:26:

"If any man come unto me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple."

Jesus' followers are theives

- John 10:8:

"All that ever came before me are thieves and robbers..."

Sadistic Jesus

- Matthew 5:29:

"And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish..."

Coward Jesus

Jesus gets run out of the temple and is afraid of people..

- Luke 12:4:

"And I say unto you my friends, Be not afraid of them that kill the body, and after that have no more that they can do."

- John 8:59:

"Then took they up stones to cast at him: but Jesus hid himself, and went out of the temple..."

- John 7:1:

"After these things Jesus walked in Galilee: for he would not walk in Jewry, because Jews sought to kill him."


Peaceful Jesus?

- Luke 12:51-52:

"Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division: For from henceforth there shall be five in one house divided, three against two, and two against three."

- Matthew 10:34:

"Think not that I have come to send peace on earth: I come not to send peace, but a sword."

- Matthew 26:52:

"...for all they that take the sword shall perish with the sword."

- Matthew 22:36:

"...and he that hath no sword, let him sell his garment, and buy one."

Jesus isn't God, but wonders if others are

- John 10:34:

"Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are gods?"

See also


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