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God sent me

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This is likely a total fabrication and not based on any true event. The message goes...

A United States Marine was attending some college courses between assignments. He had completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan . One of the courses had a professor who was an avowed atheist and a member of the ACLU.

One day the professor shocked the class when he came in. He looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, “God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I’ll give you exactly 15 minutes.” The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop.

Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, “Here I am God. I’m still waiting.” It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him; knocking him off the platform.

The professor was out cold. The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence. The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, “What the hell is the matter with you? Why did you do that?”

The Marine calmly replied, “God was too busy today protecting America’s soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like an ass. So, He sent me.”

Suffice to say the antagonist in this little fairy tale represents the symbolic enemy of conservatives: a liberal, leftist, atheist, secular, ACLU-card-carrying college professor. That's very convenient isn't it? I'm surprised there wasn't a reference to Clinton somewhere therein.

This is a good example of how theists show of the hypocrisy of their beliefs. Assaulting a teacher who has the audacity to exercise his "God-given free will?" Never mind Jesus' so-called preaching about turning the other cheek and Christianity being a religion of love and respect, theists get quite a chuckle from the end result of a theist physically hurting a non-believer.

Furthermore the marine's statements don't make sense either. If God is "busy protecting American soldiers" he's doing a really crappy job. Statistically, there seems to be no indication one way or another than any supernatural influence is in play to protect any American servicemen. They're still dying daily.

Further insult to injury is added at the implication that if we hadn't invaded Iraq, we would have lost our freedom of speech. Iraq never posed a threat to the country or the Constitution. The commander-in-chief that controls the military, that's another story entirely. --Pile 15:20, 30 August 2007 (CDT)


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